I'm starting to see the progress - in the measuring tape as well as the scale. I weigh in tomorrow for the official weight, but my guess is around 3 lbs this past week. Whoot!
Gonna get a Y membership for the fam - that'll come with a trainer for me and a 12 week training program. As I said to the hubby, I may never have 6 pack abs but it's time to lose the keg.
I have so much more energy these days, and I fill up so much faster. I don't want to snack at night either, which blows my mind. I had to MAKE myself eat some popcorn last night, just to meet my Points requirement.
The thing that keeps flooring me? This is FUN.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Numba 2
Laundry put away, garage sale stuff gone through to take to K's tomorrow, shower soon.
Ok, so here's the thing - I'm fat, and I'm tired of being fat, so I'm on this long stupid journey to not being fat anymore. As my husband keeps reminding me, I've done it before, I can do it again (except this time without the gaining it all back plus 50 more). It's not easy though. In fact it's the opposite of easy, which in this case is 'sucky.'
So, stats: beginning weight on June 10th was 304.2 lbs. After 2 weeks of Weight Watchers, on June 24th it was 298.2. I know logically that that is a good start, but I'm a very impatient person and I personally think it sucks. I want to go to sleep tonight and wake up right before Halloween 50 lbs or more lighter. However, without some form of coma (and really, who wants that...) I don't see that happening, so it's the slow-as-snails process for right now. Suck.
I have a Wii Fit Plus, though, and a recumbent exercyle, and a good pair of walking shoes, so I'm trying. Making the (very sudden) transition from sedentary eat-a-bag-of-potato-chips-every-evening lifestyle to get-up-at-5-a.m. and only eat what WW tells me I can lifestyle has been a bit of a shock to ye olde system. I tend to go overboard with each thing in my life so I have to be careful that I don't get too nuts with this, because I KNOW all the tricks, I KNOW all the truths, I KNOW that not eating does the opposite of what you think it will - I KNOW enough to be a trainer, I just don't put it into practice on myself often, in either direction. That's my sticking point.
So, next is to figure out how to post photos - let's see...
In the wayback machine - July of 1999, approximately 195lbs:
Then, I got pregnant, got lazy, got pregnant again, got more lazy, went through severe depression, stayed lazy, hid my depression in a bag of chips (many, many bags of chips) and this past May was:
In this pic I'm somewhere in the neighborhood of 305 here.
So, finally, something in me flipped over - it was time to stop drowning my sorrows in french onion dip and fucking DO something about it. Unfortunately I did not take a "before" picture the first week, but I did this past week, so here's two weeks in to WW:
This is 298.2 lbs.
Of course, I went through my closet today - one of the helpful hints I read recently was to get rid of any clothes that don't make you feel good about yourself, and since I get most of my clothes at the thrift store (not a money issue really, more an "I don't want to spend real money on fat clothes" issue - even though it's been more than 10 years since I was anywhere near thin, that mentality never completely left me, which is probably a good thing, in retrospect...) Wait, were was I? Oh, right - since I get most of my clothes at the thrift store, a lot of them fall much more into the "well, it fits" category and less into the "I really love this" category. So, point was, I went through and weeded out my closet today - which was good - and found a pair of black pants that I bought when I was at my thinnest 10 years ago. Not so good. I think the waist *might* fit around my thigh now. I'm not sure why I kept them - or why I put them back in my closet today - some misguided inspiration tactic I guess. I'll just have to try not to obsess.
Ok, it's time for a shower. More later.
Ok, so here's the thing - I'm fat, and I'm tired of being fat, so I'm on this long stupid journey to not being fat anymore. As my husband keeps reminding me, I've done it before, I can do it again (except this time without the gaining it all back plus 50 more). It's not easy though. In fact it's the opposite of easy, which in this case is 'sucky.'
So, stats: beginning weight on June 10th was 304.2 lbs. After 2 weeks of Weight Watchers, on June 24th it was 298.2. I know logically that that is a good start, but I'm a very impatient person and I personally think it sucks. I want to go to sleep tonight and wake up right before Halloween 50 lbs or more lighter. However, without some form of coma (and really, who wants that...) I don't see that happening, so it's the slow-as-snails process for right now. Suck.
I have a Wii Fit Plus, though, and a recumbent exercyle, and a good pair of walking shoes, so I'm trying. Making the (very sudden) transition from sedentary eat-a-bag-of-potato-chips-every-evening lifestyle to get-up-at-5-a.m. and only eat what WW tells me I can lifestyle has been a bit of a shock to ye olde system. I tend to go overboard with each thing in my life so I have to be careful that I don't get too nuts with this, because I KNOW all the tricks, I KNOW all the truths, I KNOW that not eating does the opposite of what you think it will - I KNOW enough to be a trainer, I just don't put it into practice on myself often, in either direction. That's my sticking point.
So, next is to figure out how to post photos - let's see...
In the wayback machine - July of 1999, approximately 195lbs:
Then, I got pregnant, got lazy, got pregnant again, got more lazy, went through severe depression, stayed lazy, hid my depression in a bag of chips (many, many bags of chips) and this past May was:
In this pic I'm somewhere in the neighborhood of 305 here.
So, finally, something in me flipped over - it was time to stop drowning my sorrows in french onion dip and fucking DO something about it. Unfortunately I did not take a "before" picture the first week, but I did this past week, so here's two weeks in to WW:
This is 298.2 lbs.
Of course, I went through my closet today - one of the helpful hints I read recently was to get rid of any clothes that don't make you feel good about yourself, and since I get most of my clothes at the thrift store (not a money issue really, more an "I don't want to spend real money on fat clothes" issue - even though it's been more than 10 years since I was anywhere near thin, that mentality never completely left me, which is probably a good thing, in retrospect...) Wait, were was I? Oh, right - since I get most of my clothes at the thrift store, a lot of them fall much more into the "well, it fits" category and less into the "I really love this" category. So, point was, I went through and weeded out my closet today - which was good - and found a pair of black pants that I bought when I was at my thinnest 10 years ago. Not so good. I think the waist *might* fit around my thigh now. I'm not sure why I kept them - or why I put them back in my closet today - some misguided inspiration tactic I guess. I'll just have to try not to obsess.
Ok, it's time for a shower. More later.
One down, one million to go...
I'm not much good at journal-ing. I can't even SPELL journaling. Journalling. Keeping a diary. Whatever. Anyway, I did it for a while when I was a teenager - like 13 through some haphazard entries my junior year of college - but I don't much have the patience for it as an adult. However, in the interest of saving my sanity and that of those around me (especially my husband. I'd like to keep him around for a while and I'm not sure how many more "Kirstie Alley is so NOT 200 lbs!" style outbursts he can take...) I'm turning to you-all. Lucky you.
Of course, "you-all" consists of pretty much me and the voices in my head (kidding, kidding, there aren't any voices. Not anymore.) but whatever. Here I am, so let's go from here, shall we?
Ok, I'm 38, I'm a mother of two, married almost 17 years, working full time and trying to lose somewhere in the 100-150 lb range. (The one reader who ended up here by mistake creeps away slowly - oh dear GAWD, another weight loss blog! - yeah, sorry.)
Oh, hubby is home with my salad. More later.
Of course, "you-all" consists of pretty much me and the voices in my head (kidding, kidding, there aren't any voices. Not anymore.) but whatever. Here I am, so let's go from here, shall we?
Ok, I'm 38, I'm a mother of two, married almost 17 years, working full time and trying to lose somewhere in the 100-150 lb range. (The one reader who ended up here by mistake creeps away slowly - oh dear GAWD, another weight loss blog! - yeah, sorry.)
Oh, hubby is home with my salad. More later.
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